"Hello...You've Been Selected"...

I usually try to be upbeat about my age-stage in life, but age- specific telemarketers are making it very hard!  I can't tell you how many times I answer the phone to hear a recorded message, geared toward the elderly.  I know we have "special needs" but come on!

One that really irks me is "Did you know that 80 percent of "seniors" will fall in their homes this year?"  Yes, I know that.  I'm a big part of your statistics already...Or the weekly call, telling me that I've been chosen to test a new security system that will keep us safe from those "who prey on the elderly". Particularly offensive are the calls, asking me to serve on a panel regarding incontinence.  I'm not THERE yet, either!

And my aggravation isn't limited to telephone marketing either.  I bet we receive a piece of mail daily, asking us to give THEIR health insurance plan a look, or  have we given any thought to "long-term nursing home insurance"?  Geesh!  Quit rushing me!

I know that the number of baby boomers makes us a very sought-after demographic, in terms of sales, but please!  It's almost like they're trying to talk us into being needy...but  the constant reminders that I need this and I need that, strengthens my resolve not to need any of what they're selling.

And NO!  I'm not interested in a plot in your burial park!!!

What? Me Worry?

What?  Me Worry?

Worrying...I keep reading that it is really bad for you, health-wise.  Maybe because I'm getting older, I pay more attention to such information.  But  really I've known that forever!  I'm a worrier...always have been, probably always will be.  If I can't find something to worry about, I'll worry about the fact that I have nothing to worry about!  It's probably genetic.  My Dad was a worrier.  Of all his wonderful attributes, it figures I'd inherit the "worry gene"!

I think it's probably normal for Moms to worry about their kids.  What they eat, where they go to school, who they're with... And when they grow up and move out, the worrying doesn't just stop.  Are they happy with their jobs?  Are they enjoying their lives?  Are they healthy? Are they worrying?  Throw parents,  in-laws, grandkids and friends into the mix and you have enough to worry about for a long time.

Prayer is my first "go-to" when I'm worrying.  For years I've been saying "Trust in the Lord, but lock your car"...  You do what you can and then let Him handle it.  I figure the good Lord has heard it all before and I should just turn it all over to Him.  He doesn't have to hear it in church ( I'd be in church all the time, if that was the case!)  I can pray anywhere...especially at night, when the worries really come out.  Another worry...He's probably getting tired of hearing from me.

Hubby has the healthy attitude that things always work out.  And they do.  But who's to say my worrying and praying isn't the reason?  He also thinks I need to see a therapist.  Yeah, that'll happen!

I need to work on this.   I know that.  My health -and life- may depend on it.  I need to start adopting the attitude that  Someone else is driving the bus and I'm just along for the ride.  Anyone else wanna go

80 Years of Friendship...

Recently, I had the good fortune of taking my 89 year old Mom to visit an old friend who was in failing health.  To see these old gals,  who had been best friends for 80 years, holding hands, like a couple of schoolgirls, touched my heart.  

To say I had "the good fortune" of doing this sounds odd, I know, but it really was an honor to witness.  80 years!  What a tribute to friendship!

When I pondered the visit, later on in the day, I tried to imagine what all had gone on in those two old gals' lives...80 years!  They met in grade school...probably shared stories of secret crushes...  They went through high school together...and met their future husbands.  They saw those young men off to war, both carrying on their own love affairs, over years and miles.  They were witnesses in each other's weddings and began their families.... coincidentally, both having 5 kids each. I imagine they shared recipes, child-rearing ideas, fashion and fads...all the things Moms do.  

They were part of a "card club" with other lady friends -although I  don't remember ever seeing a deck of cards.  I DO remember the food that was served when it was Mom's turn.  We knew there'd be leftovers the next day...appetizer and dessert treats we seldom got to sample.  I remember, too, sitting on the top stair, out of view, listening to the chatting and giggling....something that we didn't hear too often. Our Moms,  cackling and carrying on!

My Mom and her dear friend's social lives intertwined, through the years, and their husbands were best friends, too...all because of their friendship.  Dances, trips, dinners out, all the fun things couples do...The years took their toll and their fun times started to dwindle.  Health problems entered the picture...  My Dad passed away.  Although the "couples fun" ended, the two old gals' friendship never waned.

Mom wasn't sure she wanted to visit her friend in those last days.  "I don't think I can stand to see her that way".  I realize now that my Mom was saying good-bye, not only to her dear friend, but also to such a large and fun part of her own life.  It was hard.  

Mom has said since, that the hardest part of growing old, is losing your friends and being left behind.  Life, good health, and friendships are precious...Thanks, Mom and Dorth, for that reminder...

Editing, De-Cluttering, Simplifying....

I've decided that if this weather is going to hang around for awhile, I'm going to do something productive - inside.  That way, when the weather breaks, I'll be ready to tackles things outside.

My project will be to declutter things around here. "Edit" is a big word used by professional organizers these days so I'm going to start editing the heck out of the house...starting with closets.  There are many terrific organizations that could use the things that I no longer use -or can they? Well,  I'm going to de-clutter.  Maybe there will be a home for my cast-offs.  I hope so, anyway!

Why is it we accumulate so much "stuff"?  I've hung onto my "professional" clothes, and that ship has sailed, for sure!  Am I sentimental about having had a "career" and it's over now?  I miss the good folks I worked with and for but I love things the way they are now.  Time to pitch 'em!  (The clothes...not the people I worked with...)

I have three different sizes represented in my closet.  Even if some of those clothes ever fit again, they're far from "current".  Whoever thought shoulder pads in women's clothes were a good idea?  I'm sure I thought I was "all that" back then when all I really looked like was an NFL linebacker!    But not everything in my collection is so dated.  Some of it doesn't fit anymore,  never looked good in the first place or went with anything else in my closet.  We just don't get that dressed up anymore...why am I saving all these dresses and  skirts?

And shoes?  I used to love high heels!  I had some great looking stilettos back in the day. The foot pain that came with wearing them, or towering over most of the men in our circle, was no deterrent.  I rocked that look and what for?  Well, not anymore!  Comfort has become too important so out they go, too!

There really is no good reason to have closets, bulging with things that are no longer of use.  I certainly hope they can be used by someone.  Maybe a kid taking part in an "90's Theme Day" at a school somewhere?  Maybe someone who's into "vintage" will think my cast-offs are a hoot to wear.  I don't know but my closets are going to have the hell 'edited" out of 'em.  It's just "stuff" and I'm going to simplify.

 So if you see someone walking around in stilettos, looking like a linebacker, just know that she found some terrific bargains at a local thrift store and I've accomplished my task!

Phys Ed...a.k.a. Misery

Not sure why I've been so nostalgic about my high school years lately.  Maybe it's that we've lost a few classmates recently...I don't know... I do know that not everybody looks back fondly at that time in their lives, but I do.  Hope you don't mind my going back.

During those years of teenage angst, I guess I fared pretty well....maybe better than many.  But I had my times of not fitting in, of trying to find my niche....but it sure wasn't going to be in phys ed!  Now I haven't been to a phys ed class in over 45 years -I'm sure they've changed a lot.  Just think of the progress that's been made in fitness in that time!

Back in the 70's ( Oh, here she goes again!) in the school I was blessed to attend, we had phys ed every day. We would don these dorky one-piece gym suits, with our last name, emblazoned on our breast pocket....mainly so our tyrannical gym teacher could yell out the correct name when you weren't performing up to par.  (My name was mentioned a few times.)  We'd wear tennis shoes that we'd return to our lockers after each gym class because, back then, that's the only time you needed them.

We'd then make our way up to the gym for whatever plans "the tyrant" had.  Our gym was separated by a big canvas curtain...boys' class on one side, girls on the other.  I guess it was because the boys played rougher games, like dodge ball and basketball...or maybe, things were just more separate then.  I just know I was grateful because of the aforementioned dorky gym suits!

I remember praying, in the beginning of the school year, that I would have phys ed during the end-of-the- day 8th period. (The things we thought important enough to pray for back then!) That meant you could go home without having to take a dreaded shower.  (To this day, the smell of Right Guard deodorant brings back memories...) I always pitied the girls who had phys ed first period - many times, they'd have a kind of "drowned rat" look to take with them the rest of the day.  So you get it -my priorities were misplaced and my heart was anywhere but in phys ed.  

Girls' sports were woefully lagging behind boys sports back then.  We had intramural games and teams for the real girl athletes. But in our gym class, we did calisthenics, some "tumbling", a little bit of volleyball and running laps.  I had the athleticism of a rock and was miserable the entire time. 

Now, keep in mind that "fitness" wasn't a big item on anyone's agenda back then.  Our folks probably didn't own a pair of "Keds".   And sweatpants hadn't been invented yet.  If you rode a bike, it was to get from point A to point B....not for fitness' sake.  Funny how things change.

I'm happy to report that my attitude towards fitness has changed, as well.  I think that has to do with aging and wanting to prolong my life.  But when I think back to my phys ed classes in high school, when a tall, doppy girl had to report to that dreaded  class, the only prolonging that was in the equation was my misery.

If you're old enough to remember any of this, I hope I've jogged your memory a bit and you've thought back, fondly or not, to those days of phys ed.  And if you're too young for any of this to register, hit your knees tonight and thank the Almighty!

Hello" or "H...E...L..L..O..."

I guess we're a couple of the dwindling number of folks who have a landline phone in our house.  Sure, I have a cell phone and it pays for itself in convenience.  I get it.
Being able to call someone when I'm out and about is terrific!  

I also get texting, sorta.    Contacting someone, without really interrupting them, is pretty neat.  But  telephones were invented AFTER typewriters, so it seems like we're going backwards, doesn't it?  I personally like the sound of a voice in my conversations.  There's something warmer about hearing a friend versus hearing FROM one.  Plus my spastic fingers make texting a long drawn out process.  I can talk a lot faster.

I may be wrong, but without a landline, I think our home would lack a connectedness.  No central station.... I'm glad cellphones weren't around when our kids were young.   They could've said they were  somewhere and not been there at all.   Our folks, years ago, knew who we were talking to and for how long, because they were right there. If that sounds mistrusting, it is!  I was a kid once and I had three of my own.  

To this day, If one of my friends calls our landline and the spouse answers, there's a good chance he'll engage them in conversation.  And I do the same with his friends.  Maybe that's not so enjoyable for them, but I enjoy it!  That would be missing if we're always using our own cellphones.

We'll have a phone at the old homestead for as long as they allow them.  I think it gives the place permanence...represents something tangible... an address...  I'll keep using my cellphone, too...and who knows?  Maybe someday,  I'll be a convert and lose the landline...But for now, we can be reached at the same number we've had for over 30 years, sitting in my comfy chair...  "Hello"?

I Haven't the "Remote-st" Idea!

So who died and made the male species the main controller of the TV remote?  Does that convenient tool always end up in the hands of a guy in your house?  I have to say that ours is a 75%- 25% split most of the time...with the hubby maintaining possession the most.  And why is that?

Someone once said that "Men are hunters and women are nesters".  That's probably true, when applied to our TV remote.  Hubby tends to flick thru the channels, hoping to find something better than what he just had.  I, on the other hand, tend to "nest"...  I find a show I like and stay there.  Maybe it has something to do with attention spans.  I don't know...

And I get that HGTV or the Food Network isn't his idea of interesting viewing, but who said football games or countless repeats of  movies like "Tombstone" or  "Gangs of New York" interest ME?   Oh, that's right!  He has the remote!

Separate rooms with TVs and DVRing -a great service offered by our cable provider - have made our living together a bit more peaceful but I refuse to give up my custody battle for the main remote!  One day, maybe I'll get to have it every other weekend....  We'll see.

Picture Perfect-NOT!

I've been working on an ongoing project for about three years now...and I can finally celebrate its completion!

Now it's my fault I allowed things to get to this state in the first place - I'm talking about family photos!  I've been throwing them into boxes for forty years and talk about overwhelming!  Wow!  I've been the photographer all those years -turns out I just didn't want to be the family archivist!

There are pictures of the boys, pictures of friends, pictures of the boys' friends, pictures of my folks, my siblings, the in-laws, my co-workers, hubby and I...Family vacations, holidays, trips with friends.  I took a lot of photos!   As a first-time Mom, I couldn't get enough photos of our new addition.  When the second son arrived, the photos were fewer....by the time the third son came, I was lucky to be able to even find the camera-let alone, take pictures!  We joke now that if we can't identify a picture of one of the boys, we put it in the youngest one's stack, because he got so short-changed! (Just kiddin', "youngest one"...)

So my plan was to make an album for each of the boys -now I'm not talking a cute elaborate scrapbook...this is a basic album with different stages in their lives noted...and the remainder of the photos are going into a manila envelope for them to do what they want with them.  Mission accomplished!  My project is complete!

Oh, not so fast!  What, at this stage of my life, am I going to do with the rest of the pictures?  To put them in albums at this late date, seems silly.   When I'm gone, who's going to even want them?   I figure the kids will back a dumpster up to the house and the photo albums will be tossed in the first load.  Maybe I should give the kids more credit...maybe they'll be a bit more sentimental than that.

Remember when the drugstores that developed our photos offered "free doubles"?  How hard would it have been for me to send them to those special people who were in the photos -- or to even just pitch them? Nope, into the box they went.  I guess I thought the relationships were too precious to throw away any evidence of them.  And those cameras in the 90's that produced those long "landscape" photos?  Even if I DID keep up with albums, those pictures wouldn't have fit!  And why, oh, why didn't I mark the backs of the photos with names...or dates...or places?   I struggle to identify some of those faces now- and those who inherit the photos after I'm gone, certainly won't know who they are!

I think today, there should be concern for a dilemma the opposite of mine.  In this world of camera phones and "selfies", is anyone developing their photos anymore?  If not, I have a few hundred you can have.  In forty years, you probably won't be able to identify yours, either!